Grub on Kuche

It is a new week of grubbing, stay hungry my friends.

I will be starting out the week blogging about an extraordinary restaurant hiding in the poverty that is Downtown Los Angeles. Wurstküche (German for "sausage kitchen") is a phenomenal sausage grill, that churns out the firest SAUSages this side of Germany. Sam Adams, The Treasurer, and HNIC were in attendance as usual. Denny Franklin was missing, probably at church with his 31-year-old boyfriend.

Wurstküche was shown to me a while back, by my parents. I couldn't let the Founding Fathers and the Philosophy continue to miss out on the delicious variety of Würste they offer. The Treasurer very kindly swooped us from Sam Adams house in the Grubmobile - a mini-van without a middle row for maximum comfort. A vehicle of this nature was needed for the long drive to Downtown LA.

Sketchtown, CA

After experiencing gears while meeting Sam Adams' father, a very nice Frenchman who grubbing tough on Cracker Barrel, we took off for our grubventure. The road to Grublightenment was not a pretty one. We passed by scores of vagabonds, many of them obviously overtaken by the symptoms of schizophrenia. You and I would go crazy too if deprived of the fire grub for such long periods of time. Our stomachs go out to these unfortunate individuals. The buildings we passed matched the people sleeping on them. Empty... Faded... Broken...

Inside the Sausage Grill

Sorry for that depressing rant, I will remind myself to be PYT'd at a later time. We finally reached the Los Angeles Historic Arts District in Downtown Los Angeles after passing through blocks of businesses in languages other than our own. It looked like we had entered a different country, and we were very frustrated with this minorly retarded fact of life. The buildings here were great to look at - a mixture of traditional griminess peppered with modern concrete, steel, and brick was seen in every direction. Würstkuche was no different: a stainless-steel sign on a brick building with large wood sliding doors.

Grubbing tough on that Bratwurst

We waited in like for about ten minutes. Remember, this place is so fire it has a massive following and will always have a line. It was jam-packed with hipsters and men with beards. We saw about 25 beers on tap at the bar, each served in a different glass. We were the only ones not drinking, of course. A bottle of Chimay the size of the HNIC was seen on sale for $250.  Sam Bruce and the HNIC stayed safe with Bratwurst and Spicy Italian Sausages, which they loved like no other, but The Treasurer and I had to go Exotic. I went with the Alligator and Pork, Smoked Andouille sausage, which was hickory smoked and amazing. It was topped with Spicy Peppers and Carmelized Onions on a perfectly toasted bun. My exquisite sausage sandwich was paired with Belgian Fries and Chipotle Aioli, which I had to share with HNIC due to his baschness. The Treasurer decided to try the Rabbit & Rattlesnake with Jalapeno Peppers sausage. This was a great Würste, very juicy and flavorful. He spilt his fries with Sam Adams, and chose Chipotle Aioli and Bleu Cheese Walnut & Bacon sauces. I have to say, Chipotle Aioli sauce is probably the best sauce I've ever had in my entire life. Please get it if you go or I will PYT you, without the warning call.

Holy Alligator. Pork. Belgian Fries. Chipotle Aioli Saus.

Dopeness outside.

Overall, I can say that this fine establishment is the broodest sausage grill in LA, and you should go immediately. If you cannot make it out to Downtown LA every single day like us, don't cry like a basch. Wurstküche is supposedly opening a new location in Venice at the old Air Conditioned Lounge.

Downtown LA Location:
800 East 3rd Street
Los Angeles, CA 90013-1820
(213) 687-4444
Stay Saucy,
Aidan Hamilton